Friday, April 29, 2016

The Consequence of Loving Colton by Rachel Van Dyken

My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Blurb: My name is Milo Caro and I have a confession to make.

I’ve been in love with Colton Mathews since I was five. He should have known that sharing a cookie with a sugar obsessed little monster would do the trick–it sealed his fate. So really, the fact that he’s sporting a black eye, a limp, almost got ran over by a car, and was nearly responsible for another person’s death? Right. His fault. Not mine. 

I made a pact with myself–this weekend would be different. I’d come home for my brothers wedding, smile, and Colton would naturally melt into my arms, we’d get married have five kids, live in a house by the river, and get a dog named scratch (clearly I’ve thought this through).

What really happened? I punched my brother in the face, Colton kissed me and apologized, I lied about having a boyfriend, oh and everyone wants to meet the mystery man. 

They say laughter always comes before insanity–ha, ha. All I wanted was my brother’s best friend…instead I’m sitting in prison. 

Let this be a lesson to you all…life rarely happens the way you want it to. 

Damn cookie

My Review: 
If I had to use a single word to describe this story it'd be "ridiculous".
It had SUCH a good start and I honestly enjoyed it so much till the point where everybody starts planning how to sabotage Jason's marriage.

In a bid to make it hilarious, the author went all over the place. I mean, Max and Reid get assaulted, Jason turns into human pulp because he just can't stop getting injured for some reason, Colton and Milo are busy playing games with each other while the rest of the characters are running here and there doing random crap which is supposed to be found funny by the reader, I'm guessing.

I love a good romantic comedy and I did like the romance part between Milo and Colton. I'm actually really fond of jealousy games between two lovebirds but the book's rating automatically went down from a 4.5 to 2.5 in my mind when the horny Grandma assaulted Reid, both mentally and physically.
Imagine an 80 year old man running after a 20 something, touching her, grabbing her inappropriately and taking the harassment to such an extent that the female actually tries to take drugs and gets drunk to cope with it. No matter how lightly you try to put this scene in your story, it'll still be scorned upon and not be found funny.

However, you reverse the genders, and suddenly it's okay to portray sexual harassment because it's happening to a man. The whole thing between Reid and the creepy Grandma just disgusted me, not to mention the scene where Max is sent to Jason's fiance's bachelorette party and he comes back traumatized, and tries to cut down a tree to make himself feel manly again. (I STILL can't figure out how cutting down a tree gives you back your manhood). Anyway, while this is going on the men call it taking one for the team while our pretty princess Milo cheers on.

It reeeeealllyyyyyy got on my nerves how lightly the author just put such incidences in the latter part of the story and tried to pull them off as funny scenes and it reeeeaaaallllyyyyy annoyed the crap out of me when this book with such an amazing start ended up disappointing me like this.

I don't think a lot of people mind or even notice that men get harassed and traumatized too but that doesn't mean it isn't a serious issue and trying to pull it off as something funny is just sad. I really expected better stuff from this book.